Irritable Love Syndrome
If you have ever suffered with IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome) you know just what a pain in the …. this ailment can be. The syndrome is characterized by a group of symptoms including diarrhea, cramping and abdominal pain as well as mucus in the stool. While there may be no visible evidence or damage to the digestive system, there is most certainly discomfort experienced by the person suffering from IBS. According to the Mayo Clinic, the exact cause of Irritable Bowel Syndrome is unknown. What they do know is that IBS can be managed through lifestyle changes.
I suggest there is a similar syndrome, probably far more common than IBS, afflicting humans here in the world. This other ailment, Irritable Love Syndrome (ILS), is also a pain in the …. But for very different reasons. Hopefully we are all familiar with the patience of love and the kindness of love. We should also know that love is not envious, boastful, arrogant or rude. Love will not insist on its own way. But do we know that love is not irritable? That one may have been missed among all the good things that love is and the bad things that love is not.
Irritable or irritability is characterized by a “tendency to be easily annoyed or made angry.” In medical terms it is said to mean “abnormally sensitive”. According to what we know about love, we should not see this tendency in it. Love should not be abnormally sensitive, grumpy, grouchy or moody. In other words, love is steadfast, unchanging, unconditional, unwavering, un-anything that is not rock solid. Unfortunately, we as humans experience so little of true love that we are accustomed to the bastardized form that is exhibited in Irritable Love Syndrome.
This ILS epidemic is so bad that the symptoms of the ailment are now the norm in our society. What are the common reasons for divorce? Infidelity? Money? Lack of communication? The list goes on but so does the ILS symptoms. Let’s face the facts. If we are giving up on our commitment to love one another, frankly regardless of the relationship, we are simply giving in to our tendency to love irritably.
Here’s the thing - Jesus commands us to love one another “as I have loved you.” (John 15:12) Jesus is God. Jesus tells us to love others in the same manner that He, God, loves us. God is the sole source of love. In fact, the Bible states that God is Love (1 John 4:8). God gives us the power to love by bestowing His love on us. It is through His grant of love that man can experience and show love one to another. The love that we share originates from God and is in form that same love that God has for us. God’s love for us is immeasurable. It is so great that it is beyond our ability to quantify its level.
Our irritable love, and even more, our inability to love at all comes about when we apply the world’s standards to that love that comes from God. When we interject our desires, our concepts, our beliefs into the perfect love that God shares with us is when we develop the ILS and our relationships fall apart. How do we overcome Irritable Love Syndrome? Well, it’s simple in words and infinitely hard in practice. But here it is - sacrifice yourself. “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” (John 15:13)